Confessions of a Chatroom Freak by Mr. Biffo

I must confess that I am a late comer to the idea of chatrooms. When I first stumbled onto the Internet, the idea of chatting to people I didn't know held little to no appeal for me. I didn't understand the thrill that some people got from chatting in Internet chatrooms.

What I didn't know is that most people go into chatrooms to have cybersex or meet up for sex; thus the excitement. It seems I was chatting in all the wrong places. I wasn't surprised at the huge amount of sex chatrooms. After all, the Internet itself has three uses: Porn, Information and Porn. Everything else is just fodder.

I never had the guts to go into sex chatrooms though so I have never really been able to experience what those kind of chats are like. Thankfully, Mr. Biffo has all the guts I don't have and more and has written one of the funniest books of the decade: Confessions of a Chatroom Freak.

Posing as LoopyLisa21f, Biffo entered singles and sex chatrooms and talked to men about the most hilarious, hysterical things, least of all sex. How wonderful is that? And thankfully, Mr. Biffo has preserved all these chats for us! Confessions of a Chatroom Freak contains transcripts of genuine conversations between LoopyLisa21f and many, many men.

That may sound like a very simple premise, but Mr. Biffo takes it to the next level. Not only does LoopyLisa21f talk about sex, she talks about all manner of things including farting, cats, flooding apartments, disciplining children, forehead models, car engines, snogging in cages and more!

If this sounds too good to be true, it isn't! Confessions of a Chatroom Freak is utter glorious madness and I for one couldn’t be happier! It shows you what really goes on in Internet chatrooms if you haven't been brave enough to do it yourself and reveals an underside of men that is usually hidden.

It'll also make you laugh until your sides hurt and tears are running down your face. I have never laughed so hard, ever, while reading a book. I can't describe how incredibly laugh out loud funny this book is, I don't even have the words.

To give you an idea, here's a brief exchange between LoopyLisa21f and one of her would be suitors:




Swanvester1975: are you really Loopy?

LoopyLisa21f: I don't know about that, but I'm certainly quite itchy! My cat has fleas, you see.

Swanvester1975: ok not fun

LoopyLisa21f: I've scratched a hole in my t-shirt already, and I'm practically through to the bone on my ankles. That ins't even a lie!

LoopyLosea21f: What's good for lea-bites-other than rubbing your shines against a flea-ridden cat, that is? Ha. Ha. Ha.

Swanvester1975: vinegar

LoopyLisa21f: Urrrgh! I'm not drinking that!

LoopyLisa21f: I could mix it with some orange squash, I suppose.

Swanvester1975: are you mad!?

LoopyLisa21f: You're the one who told me to drink vinegar. It isn't my idea.

LoopyLisa21f: It might taste better if it has ice cubes in. Hang on.

LoopyLisa21f: I'm going to find out. One moment please.

LoopyLisa21f: …..

Swanvester1975: hello??

LoopyLisa21f: OK! Back now.

LoopyLisa21f: I have to say - That is the most DISGUSTING drink I've ever had.

LoopyLisa21f: I took two big mouthfuls, but most of it came out again - through my nose and bottom.

Swanvester1975: jesus

LoopyLisa21f: That is the most revolting thing I have EVER tastd. Worse even than the time Craig made me eat a bit of mud he'd picked.

LoopyLisa21f: I can really taste the vinegar through the squash and the ice. I thought it would be disguised more than that, but it isn't at all.

Swanvester1975: u off ur trolly. Took your mind off the bites though

LoopyLisa21f: Yes but now I'm thinking about doing some vomiting.

LoopyLisa21f: Do you want some advice?

Swanvester1975: yes

LoopyLisa21f: Don't ever dilute orange squash with vinegar and try to drink it. It's horrible. You see - it will make you want to vomit.



Confessions of a Chatroom Freak is pure, unadulterated lunacy and bedlam and I loved every word. Mr. Biffo has written an excellent case study of the Internet, men and sex and has rolled it all into one hilarious book.

If you need a cure for the Winter Blues, there's no better cure than Confessions of a Chatroom Freak. It'll make you laugh, giggle and snort. But be warned: If laughing like a lunatic in public places is your thing, than read Confessions of a Chatroom Freak.

People will wonder why you're laughing so hard, they'll need to get their own copy! This is seriously great fun and an absolutely amazing book! Get your copy and start laughing today!

My Boyfriend Is A Tawt by Zoe McCarthy

I have dated a lot of men in my life. And most of them have been twats. After each break up, I always promised myself that I would not date that kind of man again, that I would not fall under the spell of the Twat.

The only problem was that I didn’t know how to recognize one. I had no idea that Twats come in all kinds of different shapes and sizes, that there is no real way of preparing yourself, of arming yourself against a Twat.

That is, until now.

Zoe McCarthy, author of the award winning blog My Boyfriend is a Twat, has compiled a book of the same name which is subtitled: A Guide to Recognising, Dealing, and Living with an Utter Twat.

Finally! A book for all of us who have dated Twats, loved Twats, are living with Twats! Something to help all the Twat lovers unite and discover their secrets of annoyance! I opened the book with glee, expecting a very funny, tongue in cheek book about Twatdom.

It includes chapters on The Twat (or how to recognize one), the Twat at Home, The Twat at Play, the Twat at Work so that you can recognize a Twat wherever you go. It even includes a quiz so that you can find out whether or not your current squeeze is a Twat or not; probably one of the most important quizzes you will ever take!

Never did I expect that, as well as being incredibly funny, the book would also be moving, insightful, reflective and deeply personal. Part guide, part memoir, My Boyfriend is a Twat is a very personal and revealing look at what living with a Twat is like and how Zoe handles herself.

I knew from reading her blog that the book would be funny, but I had no idea that the book would be so personal. As I read, I was awed by Zoe's humour, her perseverance and the strength of her character and spirit.

The book isn't just about living with Twats. It's about recognizing that, though the Twat may be stupid sometimes (or all the time) and does an incredibly bizarre thing, that's okay. Because love is where you find it, or where it finds you.

What I love most about this book is that, even though Zoe is using her life as an example, she still has enough courage to laugh about everything. Through most of this book, I was laughing so hard that tears slid down my cheeks.

It's a lot harder to write in a humorous way than most people think and I applaud Zoe for writing such a work. It's one of the funniest, most heart felt, beautiful books I've read in a long time and I know I'll be reading it again.

My Boyfriend is a Twat is really a study of human nature, of what makes Twats tick. It's an intimate look into one woman's life and I applaud her courage for writing it down for us all to enjoy.

If you haven't read it yet, what are you waiting for? Read it now, buy three copies! One for yourself and two for your friends who are dating Twats! You'll be doing them a favour, trust me!